My Confession of Insecurity and Fear – You Are Not Alone!

Posted in Committment, Fear, Personal Development, Sales, Success | By

I woke up this morning feeling perfectly fine!  I had a good night’s sleep…ready for the day…lots of business flowing to me.  Then suddenly a few little tears rolled down my cheeks.  I wanted to run and hide but there was no place to go.  Life is good…why was I feeling this way? What in the world was going on?  I needed to get myself out of this scary place (that was only in my head) and I needed to do it fast!

Then came the “ah ha” breakthrough moment!

My confession:  I was afraid.   It dawned on me that I was simply feeling insecure.  To be more specific, I was afraid of succeeding in a way that I only dreamed of before!  You see, I’m working on a major transition in my life and it’s something I have wanted for many, many years but have only taken baby steps to accomplish.  Now, it can be real…and that scared me.

Someone once told me that, when it comes to this particular dream, I “dip my toes in the water” to see how it feels.  They also said that what I need to do is jump right in and THAT was the only way I can have what I REALLY want!  I need to jump in full force, body and soul, with a firm and unwavering commitment to my dream!

Can you relate to this?

Guess what?  This is the same advice I give to my clients on a daily basis.   Why do I give that advice?  It’s because it has worked for me for the past 30 years.  Those who know me well, know that I “jump in” fully committed and get things done!   That is, except for this one particular dream…which happens to be what I want the most.

What will happen in my life when I get exactly what I want?  What would happen in your life if YOU get exactly what you want?   What is holding you back from jumping fully toward your dream?

“Most people are very good at the ‘dream’ part of success.”

What I know for sure, over the past 30 years of helping individuals and business owners succeed, is that most people are very good at the “dream” part of success.

What they are not so great at is the “commitment” to doing what it takes to make that dream a reality.  They are not good at implementing the advice they receive, they are not consistent, and they are not committed for the long-term.  What most people do is “dip their toes” and run away at the first setback.  Or, they dip their toes and then get distracted by something that is comfortable and not so scary.  Unfortunately, those dreams are then set aside for another day; a day when they can comfortably dip their toes again.

I’m done dipping my toes!  I’m ready to take my own advice.  I’m ready to commit!

Are you ready?  Let’s jump!  

(I’ll even hold your hand along the way to let you know you are not alone!)

Share your dream with me!  Email me at


The “Freebie” Trap

Posted in Sales | By

Are you the kind of person who loves to help others, yet forgets that your assistance has a value. Perhaps it’s because it feels so good just to be appreciated? Trust me, helping is great. But, getting paid for it is even better!

For years I have guided and trained business owners in ways to increase sales, get attention, stay focused, and stay in service to their clients WHILE monetizing their gifts. While helping others comes very easily, helping myself was a bit of a challenge. Sure, I had a good “following” and amazing feedback filled with gratitude and success stories. People kept coming back for more!    

While this was exciting and fed my ego, it was doing nothing for my own bottom line. I was struggling to find a way to service a great number of people while monetizing what I shared.  My philosophy had always been that when I give freely, people will see the generosity and want to reciprocate in kind. I still have that philosophy. I believe in giving without expecting anything in return and I believe in the “law of reciprocity”.

The challenge came because I didn’t set limits with those I helped. I just kept giving “freely”. Meanwhile, those who kept “coming back for more” started referring others to get my free advice because they knew I would help and wouldn’t charge. The result was that I found myself spending much more time helping the non-paying clients than I did helping the paying ones! 

When you repeatedly help the same prospective client (at no charge) in hopes of turning them into a paying client, that doesn’t usually doesn’t pay off.  This is because you already set the expectation that you will continue to help…for free!

The exception to the above statement would be if you are trying to obtain a high-value long-term contract in a competitive industry.

For most of the rest of us, my solution is a simple one that business owners (especially those in a service industry) need to implement. Yes, it’s very important to offer something of value at no charge so your prospects get a taste of what you have to offer, but there has to be a limit to this and many of those “freebies” must turn into revenue. You have to stick to your plan, keep the integrity of your services and fees, but continue to do so in a loving and helpful manner. You have to learn to say “this is what I CAN do for you” (within the limits you set). Better yet, say something like:

“I am so excited to help you further and I have a plan (product, service) that will help you achieve your goal.”

When you do offer something informative and helpful (like a free consult, information packet, or free webinar) potential clients can get a sense of how you can help them solve their problem. Here’s the key: When the time comes that they ask you for even more, that is when you have the opportunity to turn it into a sale. In other words, don’t give “everything” away for free.  

If you are unsure about your worth, don’t be.  Always remember that the person who came to you for your “freebie” or advice did so knowing you have something to teach them.  A part of them already knows or hopes that you have the solution they are searching for…and that, my friend, has a value!  It’s time to monetize your gifts, knowledge, and talent…and remember, in business, time is money!

Image courtesy of © Roman Milert | Dreamstime Stock Photos